Happiest of new years, friends. Welcome to 2022.
I hope you've been able to rest up through this holiday season enough to recharge for the opening of this new, uncovered, blank-slate of a year. So many of us are feeling unsure, maybe even afraid. I don't know about you, but I'm returning to work tomorrow and am feeling more intense "Sunday Scaries" than usual. See, I'm really bad at sticking to routines, but it's my biggest resolution this year to at least try to discipline myself enough to wake up at the same time every morning - to not hit snooze, to actually implement a peaceful morning of journaling, slow-sipping coffee, and not rushing my ass out the door. Waking up sucks sometimes, but it is time.
The new moon in Capricorn comes at a perfect time. It's the new year, and we have claimed this as a societal time to sit down and get serious about our goals. My aunt gets me a Passion Planner for Christmas each year, and I've already taken time to fill out some of the blank pages in the back to get as detailed as I can about what I see as themes for myself this year, and what I want:
Notice how there are two routines: Ideal and "Recharge." In years past, if I couldn't achieve the ideal routine (usually by missing the first piece, waking up as late as possible to still be on time for work), I would just give up and ignore the whole thing. It really tarnished my self-trust, and would make me feel like I couldn't do anything right. Instead, I've been advised by loved ones to create a "recharge" routine - if I know the night before that I am absolutely exhausted and likely not going to be able to complete everything on the "ideal," then I'll ease up and use the recharge. I hope I can hold myself to this and be honest about what I need. Planning it out is a small step in the right direction.
So let's get planning: First, where are you right now in terms of your satisfaction with life? What do you need more of (see my "keywords" at the top of the left page above)? What will you need to adjust or leave behind from 2021 and before? What old patterns, habits, situations or relationships are no longer serving your needs and desires? In the midst of answering these questions, notice your current surroundings. Take note of any themes that have been present in life lately. Are they helping or hurting you? How can you act accordingly?
Here are some recurring themes from my Capricorn season thus far:
Colors: Lots of gray, lots of brown. It's winter's truest colors, and I've learned to love them even when they make us feel cold and melancholy.
Feelings: A quietness - a stillness not to be confused with laziness. A much needed respite. A break. An inner-knowing that it's time to spark change, but this can only happen with intense focus and care. Use the quiet, stillness, and down-time to ignite in secrecy.
Themes (as seen in my journal pages above): One of my best Christmas gifts was a "Literary Witches Oracle Deck" given in a white elephant even between my colleagues. A week or so ago, I asked what the world would present to me in the early parts of the year, and the deck presented the Wildflowers card - signifying renewal, romance, and awakening. I thought, "How fitting for the new year!" Days later, I had my first Human Design reading with my dear friend Nadia Last, one of the most wise and inspiring women I've met in recent years. I knew I was a Reflector, and I knew that meant I'm pretty rare and work differently than most people, but holy SHIT the things I learned from this reading. I now know that lowering my expectations for each day is not a bad thing; it frees up the possibilities, allowing for more spontaneity, and more to be surprised by. I know that I have followed this idea in years past, knowing that it worked for me but not knowing why.
For the remainder of Cap season, I'm toying with the idea of going through my days without a script, and without expectations. Aside from the routines to start and finish me off, the rest will be a mystery. I think it'll serve me well.
Sounds: The Capricorn playlist plays on a heavy mood, similar to me to my Leo playlist back in August. The mood here is change - change in awareness, in priority, in actions. This playlist was also a little bit of a risk to make, for me; I don't know many of the songs well. They all sort of showed up in the past few days, in passing while walking through a store, or on in the background at a coffee shop, or playing through the car speakers while in conversation with someone. I don't know them, just like I don't know 2022. Let it be a mystery, and let its meaning unfold. Click here to listen:
And finally, Intentions, though I want to share something a little different today: Lead to Gold will be a year old in just over a month, the beginning of February, on the cusp of Pisces season. This passion project is still my little baby (emphasis on little), and to be honest with you, I wasn't sure that I would really keep it up. There were countless times I considered deleting it all because I didn't think anyone cared. But in the last few months, I've seen you all here, engaging, asking questions, wanting to learn from one another, and I know that no matter how small this is right now, it matters. I want to keep that momentum going in 2022. I want to keep growing this community and continue to learn from you, and whoever may stop in for a little read. I have so much to learn, and I know some of my priorities need to shift to make Lead to Gold the best it can be as a learning community. First, I want to share with you the journal page I wrote as I was beginning to think out what I wanted to do here. I'll call it the mission statement:
I don't want to stray from this - the topics I planned on writing about, nor the priorities listed as traits I wanted to keep at the forefront. But there are changes I do see. I want more collaborators; friends and community members who have stories to share, I want to work with you in getting the truth out to others. I want to engage more with you. I want to find more of you out there who care about the same things I do - being an active participator in life, finding what lights you up, what you love, what more of the world needs. I want to grow and learn from one another so much more than we already have been. That's my intention for this space, and in all spaces of learning and community in my life.
What do you say?
Happy new year. Treat yourself with love and kindness, as I'm sending it out to you. Love you so much.
- Erin 🤍